Here is what is on my mind. My blog. It's too happy. Too cute. Which, since I primarily created it to share Eve with her grandparents and friends, is easy to do because let's face it: Eve is just too cute, too happy, for words. That's why I like pictures. Which is another problem. I don't really like to post unless I have some photos to illustrate my point, usually that Eve is too cute. When I'm moody and cynical and depressed and have argued with Richie for the umpteenth time in the DAY I don't have any pictures to go along. Which is too bad, because then my blog would be The Most Hilarious Thing In The World. And if anyone has ever read Winnie The Pooh, then you'll be able to tell that I am currently reading it to Eve, and thus my Peculiar Writing Style tonight.
I digress...so, I really like blogging. I like the fact that every blog I've gone to eventually blogs about blogging because then I feel somewhat like a Real Writer, writing about their own particular writing method. Writing on writing. Blogging on blogging. It's all so metaphysical. Kind of.
But here is The Problem: I also think most blogs are not real. I mean, they exist, but it's all happiness and "look at me and my perfect life and kids," and such nonsense. There'll be the occasional hint of something rotten, but it's never fully discussed. So Here It Is. And I've followed suit. Because as my friend Chelsea's husband Matt says, "When you try to keep up with the Jones's, you never really knew what went on, but now you check their blog and see exactly what's happening" and then you either feel like crap and are jealous because you can't do what they're doing or you do keep up with them and end up making yourself and everyone around you unhappy.
But if I make this blog Real, then my poor sweet in-laws will probably think that I hate their son and also it's one thing to vent in a private journal and another bring everyone down with you. I don't think it's healthy to dwell on negative things, though I am a big fan of venting. So I'm not really sure where to leave this conflict. Plus, I have no pictures of this inner struggle. Which is fortunate because I'm sure I look pathetic and overweight in the picture if it existed.
Just to keep in the spirit of things, here are some crappy things that have happened to me lately:
- My cycle has started up again and returned with a VENGANCE!
- For the past three days I've earnestly and happily tried to do my workout video and something always hinders me, things that are beyond my power.
- Yesterday I went into the basement to help Richard clean up and we got into a fight and I threw the kitchen timer on the ground and broke it. Then said some swears.
- My house it continually falling apart and because Richie's health insurance plan changed, we have even less money each month. . How are we supposed to get a new water heater?
- It's cold outside. Like, really really cold.
Okay so that's a pretty dumb list. I couldn't think of anything too cynical. But here are some pictures to cheer you up :)
Eve and her yoga moves...she loves doing the downward dog all the time. It cracks me up!
Eve found my camelbak and started drinking from it! Like mother like daughter.
She's ready for summer hiking!
One Last Story: the other day after dinner we were all hanging out playing and I told Richie that Eve liked to knock over stacks of blocks. He built a tower and Eve, being on the other side of the room smiled a most devilish smile, then crawled at Full Ramming Speed to the tower of blocks and BAM knocked it down with her head. We laughed for a long time and I wish that I had captured it on video. She wouldn't do it again, but it was FUNNY.
5 comments:
You need Blog #2: Renee's Rants.
I would totally read it. <3
I totally agree, everyone's blog is fake. Except TAMN's (please tell me your read Seriously So Blessed? It will make you laugh heartily. Promise.)
Blog fakery makes the world go round though, I try and think of it as a journal and when I read other people blog... I try and remember that everyone has their bad days... as well as their good ones.
Thanks for the threefer! And as a reward I give you this gigantic comment. Give Richard my regards.
Ah Renee, I love you. Remind me to tell you the story sometime of what happened to me when I quit nursing Anna then went on vacation to visit some friends in another state. Stinks to be a girl...
And your in-laws know you love your husband. I would throw things and say swear words at Richie if I lived with him, too! (Hee hee!)
How ironic that I just put some very slightly negative things on our blog and MAtt went in and edited them out because he said we don't need to air our dirty laundry for the world (the "negativity" was about how jealous I was of other newborns sleeping through the night when we're not even close...apparently it didn't come across that I was joking when I said I hated them.) Oh well, we'll pretend to live perfect lives right now. :)
Aahhh . . . the great debate.
I think that my blog is real (do you?).
But it comes at a cost -- often people feel the need to tell me that I'm too negative.
I can think of several people who misunderstand and think that I find motherhood awful (there is currently someone who has made me her "project" and is trying to rescue me from my barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen state).
By opening myself up, it leaves me open to being misunderstood.
But such is life. And the blog is for me.
But then why do I leave it public?
Hmmmm . . .
Oh the debate! What a funny world we live in.
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